Communication, sex and money are men’s biggest problems when it comes to relationships with women. Ironically, Edwin Louis Cole wrote a book with the same title with solutions for overcoming those challenges.
Men have a huge responsibility when it comes to ministering to their wives regarding these areas but by the grace of God it is made possible for them to be effective ministers.
These principles apply, however, to other relationships even though Edwin Louis Cole wrote it primarily for men. The book was birthed out of a need that he saw constantly popping up in his ministry. Poor communication has led to misunderstandings that have led to unnecessary divorce in various places around the world.
Money problems are understood to be a major cause for close to 50% of divorces worldwide. Sex is an important aspect of marriage that causes problems when couples do not treat it as it should. Perhaps you can relate in one way or another to one of these challenges.
Let us delve into some of the principles in the book that you will learn when you read it:
Your Word is Your Bond
Lack of honesty and integrity violates trust in a big way and when there is no trust a relationship suffers. Trust has to be earned, it is not just given. When you commit to your wife or any other person that you are going to do something ensure that you follow through on your word until you have fulfilled what you said you would do.
Edwin Louis Cole taught that when you give your word to your wife it remains in her custody until you honor that word. The problem when you keep giving your word and never fulfilling it puts your wife in a situation where she becomes a custodian of so many words and promises that become too burdensome to keep.
When a woman gets into such a position her trust in you can vanish beginning a snowball effect that could lead to the death of the relationship. The Bible is clear regarding this matter in terms of communication. Let your ‘yes’ be ‘yes’ and your ‘no’ be ‘no’. It is better to evaluate what it takes to follow through on a commitment before doing so.
Effective communication is important for building and maintaining good relationships with other people. You should not take it for granted. It is the difference between having great relationships and average relationships.
When you fully understand what it takes make an informed decision to say yes or no to something. Do not be someone who says they will do something and then fail to follow through on it. Doing so puts you in danger of eroding your trust account with other people.
The Sacredness of Sex
One of the principles found in this book regarding sex is, “Sex is the sign of a covenant relationship between a man and a woman.” God created sex for reproduction and pleasure but its significance is in signifying that a man and woman are one in the eyes of God. Just looking around your world today it is apparent that many people do not understand this important life principle.
Both men and women, young and old, enter into sexual relationships outside the context of marriage. When people have sex soul ties are created and when they are not broken affect future relationships with other people. Sex is not just a physical act but it is very much spiritual as well.
A man or woman in a marriage that had sex before marriage with another party and never renounced the soul tie can easily find themselves in a position where they gravitate to the past relationship. The issue of trust comes up again in the marriage and creates more problems than could have been expected.
The solution to all these problems is to abstain from sex until you are married as Edwin Cole taught in this book. You may argue that it is impossible in this world today and that everyone is doing it. The truth is that not everyone is doing it. There are some that are obeying God’s word and are experiencing happy marriages.
In the Old Testament times you would get stoned to death if discovered to be in an immoral relationship. Imagine if that penalty still applied today. People would think twice before having sex before marriage. It is possible to keep yourself pure today through the power of the Holy Spirit.
Money as Master or Servant
Men are created to be providers for their families and therefore it is not a surprise that a lot of their time is spent thinking about money. When a man fails to provide for his family it puts a dent on their confidence as a man. Providing makes a man fulfilled and I trust that as a man you can relate to that.
Money is a tool that enables you to acquire things you need to provide for your family and become fulfilled. The only problem is that it is easy to start worshipping money to the extent of sacrificing your family in pursuit of it. Failing to manage your money also leads to problems with your wife and children when obligations do not get met. While making more money is a good thing it should not come at the expense of your important relationships.
That is why Jesus taught us to seek first the Kingdom of God and His righteousness and all other things in our lives would be taken care of. Have money work for you instead of letting it become your master to avoid the many evils that have broken other families before.
There are many more valuable principles that you will learn from this book and it would be good to read it with your wife or future wife. It is a way of saving your marriage before it starts. Get yourself a copy today and apply the lessons to your life as you learn them.
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